Live Life Aggressively! What Self Help Gurus Should Be Telling You by Mike Mahler

Author:Mike Mahler [Mahler, Mike]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: What Self Help Gurus Should Be Telling You
Published: 2011-08-10T00:00:00+00:00

WE ARE GREAT AT KIDDING OURSELVES

A few years ago, Dr. Bruce Nadler (otherwise known as “The World’s Strongest Plastic Surgeon”) committed suicide. Worse, according to forensic analysis, he shot and killed his wife point-blank before going into the next room and killing himself. We hear stories like these all the time, but what makes this one different is that I knew the guy: we both spoke at the Fitness Business Summit in 2007. My wife Carol and I chatted with him and his wife, and they were very nice people. After my presentation, Dr. Nadler made a point of shaking my hand and telling me how impressed he was. Like most people, I never would have guessed he suffered from depression and that, almost a year later, his depression would reach critical mass, resulting in murder and suicide.

My initial reaction upon learning of Dr. Nadler’s suicide was shock; then, when I heard about how he killed his wife, it turned to revulsion. Taking your own life is one thing, but taking someone else out with you is not your right. That he murdered his wife is beyond disturbing.

I’ve become very interested in the study of happiness over the last years, and thinking about the Nadler murder/suicide, my brain’s been turning non-stop. I wonder what Dr. Nadler was like at my age? Did he suffer from depression then? Did he have any idea he’d go on to commit suicide at the age of 61? Further, when he and his wife married, did he have any idea he would murder her many years later? I have no idea and never will; yet, if I had to guess, I doubt Dr. Nadler held any of those thoughts. My guess is he was happy at my age and enjoyed his married life and being a doctor. Maybe I’m mistaken, but I doubt he was clinically depressed for the last thirty years. So what happened? I have no idea, but it got me thinking: where will I be in my sixties? Will I still enjoy life and continue growing as a person, or will I feel depressed with no desire to live? The latter seems unlikely given my current level of happiness, but none of us really knows what lies ahead.

We can spend our time planning out our lives, setting goals and creating an illusion of control over this crazy world, but in reality we have little, if any, control. You can be in the best shape of your life and on cloud nine one minute, then get hit by a car the next, spending the rest of your days as a paraplegic. You never know what’s around the corner. Then, every once in a while, we’ll predict something that comes to pass, feeding our ego and again reinforcing the illusion that we can see our future—yet it is just that: illusion.

The Buddha taught that all life is suffering. This sounds depressing upon superficial analysis, but the deeper meaning is our suffering is due to attachment.

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